1. Woke up in a hilltop log cabin to a garden overlooking Piesang (Banana) Valley
2. Took a drive down to the beach to do a spot of writing and check my emails since log cabins don’t specialise in internet
3. Spent a portion of my just-mailed invoice for aforementioned writing on a steamy Rooibos latte and a blissfully spicy mushrooms, scrambled egg, bacon and lamb’s liver brunch at Sao Goncalo’s, outside Plettenberg Bay
4. Sat quietly with a family of giraffes hoping that the mummy giraffe would give birth to the baby giraffe, drop him on his head and then stuff him into a thorn bush to hide him from the lions
5. Jumped a fence into the forest and tried (and failed) to find the last remaining family of the lesser-spotted Knysna Forest elephant
6. Had sundowners with zebras in a truck on a game drive
7. (i) Got bitten by an African Grey parrot named Sharka
(ii) Petted two sleepy bush babies with eyes as big as bicycle wheels
8. Drank nearly 4 litres of flavoured Nyati liqueur in the Buffalo Hills distillery
9.(i) Fell into a thorn bush and emerged scratched and studded all over with two-inch spikes
(ii) Fell down some stairs and (almost) into a campfire
(iii) Almost fell into a frozen swimming pool at midnight in the middle of the wilderness
10. Slept in a cabin on a game reserve with the world-famous Knysna Dwarf chameleon, Ready Steady Eddie
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