a tale of two bicycles

Once upon a time there was a bicycle called Nathaniel. Nathaniel was a most beloved bicycle, for one whole hour. He and his giraffe went everywhere together: out of the house, down the hill, to the shops. They dropped a video back, went for a coffee, pedalled up a hill, down to the beach. Nathaniel had a stiff pedal so the giraffe took him to the hospital quickly for some antibiotics and they pedalled back up the hill for eggs benedict in Kalk Bay. Nathaniel wasn't hungry so the giraffe ate his.

Nathaniel and the giraffe were the best of friends and couldn't imagine ever, ever being apart until at least 2pm the next day when the giraffe had to return Nathaniel to the rental shop. They drove along the coastal road, thinking about the time they had together. On their way from Fish Hoek to Simon's Town they stopped to gaze at the sea and the mountains and the rickety old train which ran alongside the beach. They would have held hands but Nathaniel didn't have any and the giraffe only had hooves. Then, disaster struck.

Nathaniel choked on his own chain and rattled to a crashing, spluttering, horrible halt, giving the giraffe mere nanoseconds to swerve herself onto the pavement and duck her long neck and head out of the way of a speeding lorry carrying a very, very wide yacht. The giraffe attempted to resuscitate Nathaniel but he was oily and disgusting so she sat on the roadside and read the Saturday papers instead and tried to drown out his cries for help with loud humming. The giraffe received several queer looks from passers by - some of whom stopped to tell her that it was rather perilous to sit on the main roadside in the middle of Cape Town - but she told them she was fine. She had the Travel supplement.

Eventually, the hire bike lady came to rescue the giraffe. Nathaniel was brought out of his coma but by then the giraffe had fallen out of love with him. He had failed her and she was not one to forgive easily. Nathaniel watched as the giraffe hopped aboard his nemesis Alfredo (see above) and pedalled off. He fought back the tears until he saw his giraffe and Alfredo standing together, gazing towards the sea and the mountains and attempting - and failing - to hold hands. Then he wept his tears of sticky oil and was wheeled home to the bin.

THE END